Kenyan comedian and media personality MC Jessy has sparked a conversation about relationships after urging women to focus on building themselves before settling down with a man.
Speaking during a podcast shared on Sunday, October 4, 2026, MC Jessy argued that women should establish themselves financially and personally instead of relying on the idea of growing together with a partner.
He claimed that in some relationships, a man may eventually outgrow his partner and move on to someone else.
“Ladies, stop this nonsense of growing with a man. Because if you grow with them, they’ll grow and leave you behind. And if you grow together, he’ll go find another lady to help her grow,” he said.
Build yourself first
MC Jessy encouraged young women to think about their own future and investments before getting into serious relationships.
He also spoke about young men, saying they should use their 20s to establish themselves financially and organise their lives. “In your 20s as a young man, have your own investment, make your money and ujipange kwanza,” he said.
His comments appeared to centre on the importance of having personal financial stability rather than making a relationship the main foundation of one’s future.MC Jessy, however, acknowledged that couples combining their incomes and resources is not necessarily a bad thing.
‘Let’s look at it economically’
The comedian then used an example of a couple with separate incomes to explain his argument.
“Let’s look at it economically. Eh, huyu jamaa ako na mshahara yake hapa. Wife maybe ako na mshahara yake mahali yako, sindio? Ndio mtataka mcombine mgrow pamoja. Ni sawa, si mbaya. Mi sijasema ni mbaya,” he said.
For him, the concern was not necessarily about couples building together, but about choosing a path that he considers more difficult when individuals can first establish themselves independently.
He described building together from an early stage as “the harder one”, encouraging people to consider what he called a “softer hard” path. “It’s just that it’s a route I don’t think I would want to encourage anybody to take. It’s the harder one. Why choose hard? Choose a softer hard,” he added.
His views on growing together
MC Jessy’s comments have touched on a common question in relationships: whether couples should build their lives together from a young age or first establish themselves independently.
While he appeared to favour personal financial growth before settling down, he also acknowledged that combining resources within a marriage or relationship can work.
His remarks ultimately placed emphasis on individual preparation, particularly financial independence, before taking on the responsibilities that come with settling down.
The comedian’s comments have since opened up discussion around how young people approach relationships, money and personal development, particularly at a time when many couples are choosing to build their careers and finances together.
