Congratulations on getting an “Mpoa” and damn! You made her go home with you too? Yeeey!
Well, for those ladies and gentlemen who haven’t yet caught up on the latest sheng: “Mpoa” means “girlfriend” or “boyfriend”.
Here comes Christmas and for some, they are about to make their ancestors a happy lot by bringing in someone. After being the center of crude jokes for years having someone to show your folks back home can be duly satisfying, or terrifying.
Here comes the holiday season, and couples are about to begin making decisions; to introduce or not introduce their partners to their families.
Introducing your partner to the family during Christmas is like staging a blockbuster film premiere, with your partner as the star attraction.
As the holiday feast beckons, the spotlight inevitably shifts to the newest family member. All eyes will be on your plus one. It’s a scenario where satisfying or terrifying your family hangs in the balance.
Bringing someone home isn’t just a mere festive ritual; it’s a Pandora’s box of relationship inquiries. Your nosy Auntie Mabel wants to know where you met – and, sorry, but a church Kesha doesn’t make for the most thrilling tale. Grandma probably hopes it involves an antique bookstore or a chance encounter at the local farmers’ market.
Lying about it might save face temporarily, but then you have to navigate the treacherous waters of explaining the lie to your partner. And let’s be real, you’ll need a Ph.D. in creative storytelling to explain the fib to your partner. Good luck with that.
According to relationship expert Laurel House, the holiday family rendezvous is a test of steel for any couple. Some relationships crumble under the pressure, revealing the not-so-cozy side of your significant other.
You will learn things about your partner that will have you rethinking why you are together in the first place.
Depending on the family, they will welcome you warmly, give you front row tickets into their family drama and you are expected to pick a side.
I know you came for the chapatti and chicken, but hey, welcome to Christmas in all its shades.
According to relationship guru Dr. Viviana Coles, a Christmas invitation conveys to family members that this person is super important and worth getting to know.
While we offer no guarantee for a blanket solution on how to deal with the family, we have prepared a short survival kit of strategies to consider before bringing someone home for Christmas.
Firstly, have the talk, and not about the weather or whether ‘Die hard’ is a Christmas movie. Discuss fears, expectations, and potential scenarios before the Christmas family spectacle. Do not drop the bomb on your partner without adequate preparation.
Next up, define the relationship! Imagine the awkwardness of being introduced with just your name. It’s like being an uninvited guest at a family reunion, and nobody wants that confusion.
Agree on talking points. Know your partner well enough to guess what topics are taboo in their family. Politics, war, religion, or comments on cooking skills; these are the landmines you want to sidestep. You’re there to charm, not to ignite a heated family debate.
Remember, people will judge you less for keeping silent than for blurting out the wrong thing. Share your family’s expectations with your partner, even if it involves weird traditions or bizarre holiday rituals like matching vitenges.
Establish a safe word or gesture. When Uncle Bob starts sharing his collection of holiday-themed socks or Aunt Gertrude gets too cozy with her mistletoe, use your code to whisk your partner away from the madness.
Happy holidays to all who will meet the family. Let us live vicariously through you.
