The source of numerous quarrels in many homes tends to be when a married couple fails to state their expectations of each other from the get-go clearly.
Many enter marriage with an idealized version of their spouses such that when their expectations are not met or realized, cracks begin appearing sooner rather than later.
One of these expectations tends to be open and clear communication with each other, alerting each other to what is going on in their individual lives within the marriage and consistently being on the same page about everything to ensure the marriage and home remain stable.
But many couples fail to set a foundation for this expectation to be realized, and problems such as a spouse living a highly individualistic life within the marriage take center stage.
While many partners would choose to put their spouses on blast and question them about their whereabouts and activities, one Kenyan pastor, Elizabeth Mokoro of the Family Life Ministry, was of the opinion that no partner, especially a wife, should question their husband’s whereabouts.
“You don’t ask a man ‘where are you coming from?’ That one you ask your brother or your child. Not your husband. Where do you get guts to stand up and say ‘what time is this that you are coming in? You won’t turn me into a watchman to open for you all the time you come in’ How are you talking?” said Pastor Mokoro in her sermon.
In a different sermon on the same topic, she was of the opinion the ‘where are you coming from’ question can only be asked to wives, not husbands, because “he needs to know where his flock is” as the head of the home.
Her sermon, a hard pill to swallow for many, garnered mixed reactions, as sampled by Nairobi News below:
“I’m a man, but it’s my responsibility to inform my wife I may be late home. It’s called communication,” said Emma Lugazi.
“She needs protection,” added Seth Amusala.
“Some advices are to be ignored,” continued Bongani.
“Aaaah mama we have passed that era. We are in the 21st century,” said Elah the Queen.
“When I stopped questioning my man, he started complaining that I no longer care about him😂,” said Jacky Symon.
“My wife wont ask me that, because she will know my whereabouts,” added Malapani.
“Nooo…as a man, I disagree with her. My wife should know beforehand if I’ll be late,” said another user.
Pastor Mokoro is renowned for preaching about family and marriage. Many of her sermons tend to be ‘controversial’ for their extreme positions, such as telling women they cannot slay while they are in marriage and that any woman who has a husband she is not fighting for with another woman does not have a good, valuable man in her hands.
